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Archive for October, 2008

Over at Yahoo! Sports, every player and many former players have profiles.  Each player has a number and that number is part of the link to their profile.  For example, the link to Wayne Gretzky’s profile is http://sports.yahoo.com/nhl/players/1.  How obvious.

I’m bored at work so I have been putting in random numbers and searching for specific players.  Here’s a few:

  • Marc Messier is #10
  • Mario Lemieux is #66
  • Jaromir Jagr is #35
  • Mike Richter is #433
  • There are 3998 player profiles with the 3998th player being Chris Stewart, the 18th overall pick of the 2006 Draft.

After putting in a bunch of random numbers I decided to pick a specific number.  Being Halloween, what better number than 666?  Of all of the players in the NHL, who could Yahoo! have given the number 666?  None other than Miroslav Satan.

While it seems that some players were given numbers for a reason (Gretzky, Lemieux), is it possible that this is just a coincidense?  I hope not.

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Even kissing Scott Gomez's ass couldn't have saved the Islanders Monday night.

Even kissing Scott Gomez's ass couldn't have saved the Islanders Monday night.

Hello again, everyone. I know Eric and I are horrible at being consistent with this blog, but we’re doing our best. We are, after all, terribly disabled. What’s this crippling disability which afflicts us, you ask? We’re lazy.

Anyfart, last night’s Monday’s game against the Long Island Douchebags was mighty fun, was it not? Rick “My Vagina Hurts, I Can’t Play” DiPietro was out, most likely watching his stories and getting a bird crap facial, so that of course meant that the Rangers’ offense was going to make Joey MacDonald look like a Vezina finalist, like they do all back-up goalies. But alas! They didn’t! With a final score of 4-2 and shot totals of 39-30, I’m a happy camper.

One thing I felt the game was missing was an all-out brawl. They came close a couple times, and there were some good fights(although Voros needs to stop it with the uppercut, he didn’t land a single one), I was getting really excited for a full-team throwdown at center ice. Although since Rick “Meat in a Man Sandwich” DP wasn’t playing, the Battle of the Pretty Boys would have to wait for another day. So I guess it was better we didn’t waste a brawl, because everyone knows, a good slamming is no fun without a DP.

So I know this is a day late, and not very inclusive, but hopefully it was entertaining and included the main facts – we won, there was no DP, and there were fights. Oh yeah, Dubi took some shitty penalties and Tommy Boy brought the hammer down on him and made him ride pine for a few shifts.  Chris Drury scored his first two goals of the season.   I think that about covers it. Until next time, my friends.

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The Rangers faceoff agaisnt the Islanders for the first time this season.  Rick “body of glass” DiPietro will be riding pine with some sort of injury (chronic sucking) while backup Joey MacDonald gets a go at it.

I’m pretty sure the last time MacDonald was in goal against the Rangers, he was a Bruin and he gave up 4 goals on 11 shots (including Ryan Callahan’s 1st and 2nd career goals) after coming in for Timmy Thomas 5:07 into the second period.  He was so bad that the Bruins put Thomas back in net to start the third.  The final was 7-0.

Here are the highlights:

I remember this because I was at this game and it was on St. Patrick’s Day 2007.  I was pretty buzzed and at one point shouted, “Hey Thomas, you’re the reason I’m pro-choice!”  And yes, I got many laughs.

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That’s right.  Last night in Calgary, the Capitals had a NINE-MINUTE POWER PLAY.  Now, one might ask, “How do you get a nine-minute power play?”

Like this:

Tyler Sloan gets a nice open-ice hit and then Rene Bourque pounces on him.  Bourque was given 4 penalties.  A five-minute major for fighting, a two-minute minor for instigating, a two-minute minor for unsportsmanlike conduct, and a 10 minute misconduct.  Keep in mind that it was just a misconduct, not a game misconduct.

On Friday against the Maple Leafs, Marc Staal laid a nasty (but clean) hit on Matt Stajan.  Almost instantly,  Jamal Mayers went after Staal and proceeded to wrestle him to the ground.

Those two plays were very similar, yet they had very different outcomes.  As I said before, the Capitals ended up getting a nine-minute power play (which they failed to score on) but in the Rangers’ case, both Staal and Mayers were given five-minute majors for fighting.

But Eric, Staal fought back while Sloan didn’t!

That’s not true.  If you go watch the first video again, you can see that Sloan throws his gloves off as Bourque comes after him.  Sloan just didn’t get any punches in and fell down almost instantly.  Staal, on the other hand, stayed up a few for a few seconds.

So why do the refs deal with these two similar plays so differently?  Is the league trying to crack down on this sort of thing?

Also, why is it that Paul Mara gets a game misconduct for sticking up for himself after he avoided what would have been a very dirty hit from the guy that broke his face last season, but Rene Bourque only gets a misconduct (which allows him to return) even after being given an instigator AND an unsportsmanlike conduct penalty?

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The Rangers freed up some room on their cap by waiving Rissmiller.  (Ideally for the Rangers, nobody else will claim him, and he will end up in Hartford for the season.)

I don’t know about everyone else, but I’d much rather see Brendan Shanahan skating along side Drury and Naslund than a constantly rotating winger group of Prucha, Fritsche, and Rissmiller.

Now, if the Rangers would just sign the guy already.

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(Yes, this is late.  Midterms.  Suck it.)

Really? – The Dallas Stars? – They’re 1-3-1, and we can’t beat them? Seriously?

I’ll be quite honest, I was looking forward to this game since this season’s schedule came out. Actually, I look forward to The Lundqvist Bowl every year (more on that later), but this year was different. Because it was the return of Sean Avery. I always loved him as a Ranger, and even up until tonight, I was still a big fan of his. I actually wore my Avery shirt the other day, come to think of it. Yes, he had expressed frustration in what he felt was being rejected by the Rangers, then seeing them turn around and give the contract he wanted to someone else. But, honest as he was, he was still gracious(as gracious as Sean Avery gets), and left his teammates out of it, which proved to me that I was totally justified in still liking him beyond his Ranger tenure.

Until tonight. You, Sean Avery, are an ass. Are you an ass for yapping at anyone and everyone during warm-ups? No. Are you an ass for getting all up in Hank’s grill on the first whistle? No. I expected you to pull all that shit. Looked forward to it, actually.

No, you are an ass for this: “Valiquette is really a minor-leaguer and he’s got to get noticed, so what better way than to talk about me?” [Source: Sam Weinman’s Rangers Report] (Ed. Note:  He’s 2-0 with a shutout!)

Also, you’re an ass for this:

With at least half a dozen onlookers nearby, Avery emerged from the Stars locker room with about four minutes remaining in the break and unleashed a barrage of obscenity at Giannone. Unclear what lit the fuse.

During his tirade, when Avery reportedly made a remark about Giannone’s wife, the broadcaster fired back. [Source: Steve Zipay’s Blue Notes]

Going after an announcer and a back-up goalie? You are one classy bitch, Sean Avery. One classy bitch.

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Can you name all 30 NHL teams in 5 minutes?

Mental Floss has a new quiz up to keep us hockey fans busy.  As you can tell from the title of this post,  it asks you to name all 30 teams in under 5 minutes.  I did it with 3:18 left on the clock.  Can you guys do it faster than me?  Post your time in the comments below.

Thanks to long time reader, Mel, for sending me the link to this quiz.

Mel: http://www.mentalfloss.com/quiz/quiz.php?q=455&p=1mental floss is a cool magazineEric: what is that?finished with 3:18 left how’d you do?Mel: i got bored halfway throughEric: took me 1 minute and 42 secondsMel: i cant even remember all 50 states

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